are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
