I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Sorry about my life...
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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