Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
