i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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