Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
