so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize