if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize