we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot