I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize