i just google imaged poop.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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