I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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