Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
