How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
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Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
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For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
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