it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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