i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize