if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize