I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize