Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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