I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize