I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
This girl is more easily done than said...
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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