I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
