i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
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I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
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I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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