Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
