didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
