Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize