i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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