a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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