Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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