then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
