Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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