You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
grandma shit on top of the toilet
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize