The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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