Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
