Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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