mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
