When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
