So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
