her vagine was all disorganized.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize