Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
