you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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