So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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