I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
I'm really busy with my period