No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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