She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
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