remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
