I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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