I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
