I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
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