It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
