GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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