In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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