She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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