Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
